


Beyond the Waves

by FlowerWishes



Category: WTFock | Skam (Belgium)
Genre: Angst, M/M, POV Sander Driesen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:46:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26879170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlowerWishes/pseuds/FlowerWishes
Summary: A journey through Sander's mind up until he sees Robbe.
Relationships: Sander Driesen/Robbe IJzermans
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	Beyond the Waves

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all,
> 
> I hope you are doing well! This is an odd creature but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless. I know it's short so I'm sorry about that.  
> Let me know what you think about it.
> 
> Stay safe xx  
> -D

The feeling of drowning. It’s a feeling of sheer helplessness, of forced subservience, of loss of control. As the waves continue to batter you again and again, nature never giving in, never giving up, always stronger, always mightier and always the winner. You gasp for air, your body craving oxygen but your head falls beneath the surface and you slip further and further down, the depths of the ocean awaiting you.

That’s how Sander feels a lot of the time, perhaps more often than not. It’s a sickening feeling but it’s become familiar, it’s known, it’s somewhat reliable because Sander knows that it will be back, he feels it will return.

Sander often feels like he just manages to bring my hand up to break through the waves and he waits for someone to grab him, something to grab him and pull him up, to save him, but nothing and no one can save him. He’s alone and falling, alone and drowning, alone and suffering.

He feels like he’s faced with a giant boulder and a steep mountain to push it to the peak of. Sander knows that he’s not strong enough to make it, to complete the task so he slumps down beside the boulder and rest on it. No matter what, he can’t escape it and even when he tries to move it, he ends up leaning on it unable to detach himself from the pain that he knows and feels.

_Why do I feel this way?_

_Why is this my burden to carry?_

_What did I do to deserve this?_

_Why can’t I fix it?_

Questions like these constantly fill his mind, constantly invade his thoughts. They make Sander feel angry and frustrated but most of all, helpless. He’s not the one in control even though he so desperately wants to be. He’s not the driver, he’s a mere passenger and the road is beyond repair, too many obstacles to avoid.

The sadness and depression let up sometimes, never for long, never forever but just enough to provide some momentary release. The waves mellow out as the fierce winds retreat. The ocean becomes serene and the sun’s rays hit his face. They feel warm and comforting, gentle and caring. He can feel a smile stretch across his face as he absorbs the happiness and joy that surrounds him. Instead of drowning, He’s floating, letting the current take him wherever it wishes because he’s content. Sander feels free and light and blissful.

But you know what they say about the eye of the storm…

The dark clouds inevitably move in and replace the shining sun and the object of his sight. The rain begins to pour down and the waves begin their dangerous dance once more.

The loneliness Sander feels in times like that, is crushing. The feeling of no one there to catch you when you’re falling, no one there to comfort you when you’re down but most of all, no one there to share in those blissful moments, however rare they may be. You don’t only need people to help you when you fall, you need people to be there when you stand back up as well.

Sander has never felt like he had anyone like that, someone to love and be loved by. Someone to share himself with and someone who would share themselves back. He feels like he has so much love to give and so much of his heart is empty and waiting for someone to fill that space. Someone who is everyone to him.

\--

Sander puts down his pencil and closes his art journal, the drawing to be finished at another time. He picks up his bag and heads out the door on his way to the garage where the garbage truck is situated. He’s looking forward to releasing some steam tonight as he gets on his bike and begins pedaling.

Sander takes out his camera making sure to capture the moments around him, the fleeting seconds between people and the little glimpses into their lives that he is able to catch.

Sander shifts his head to the side as he looks through the lens to catch sight of a boy. He’s wearing a brown jacket and there’s a mask covering his face. His beautiful curls snake down his face and he seems to be illuminated as the moonlight shines down on him. It’s like a spotlight obscuring everyone other than him from Sander’s view. Sander snaps a picture of the boy who resembles an angel to him in that moment. His heart is beating at light speed and his thoughts are racing through his mind. But one thought is played on repeat…

**He’s the one.**


End file.
